Clothing Issues – Finding MY Style

I keep hinting about a post where I write about the issue I’ve been having with clothes lately. This is going to be that post…or part of that post. Everything I want to say is going to be really long so I may break it up. But we’re going to start here and see how it goes.


At my heaviest weight, and even 50 lbs ago, I didn’t feel like I had many options in clothing. It was more find something that fit and I was comfortable in and then get that shirt/pair of pants in a few colors and there you have a uniform sort of wardrobe.

This is pretty much why I have 2-3 of the exact same shirt in different colors.

I also never felt comfortable in prints either. So all shirts I wore on a regular basis were cotton and solid colors except for a few dressier options for the couple occasions I needed to dress up for.

Some of my colder weather 3/4 length sleeved shirts had some decoration on the collar but that was pretty much the extent of what my shirts were.

As for pants, I had 2-3 pair of work pants – generally black, a couple pairs of jeans, and a pair of capris that I wore out.

This was how it was for me….until recently.

And I am not complaining or trying to complain. I am just having a really difficult time with the changes in my body that have come with the weight loss and honestly, I haven’t really known how to deal with them.

Plus, it is SO weird to try on clothes now.

I don’t really know what size I am, I am shrinking out of pants sometimes quicker than I can wear them, I am still looking for over-sized, cotton, solid colored shirts, and I don’t even know what I like or what really looks good on me.

Again, not complaining at all. I am thrilled about being in a smaller size and I have worked hard to get here.

I just feel this huge disconnect with clothes; we haven’t had a smooth relationship over the years.

So I’ve gone to the Avenue and Torrid and tried on clothes and even bought a few items – some not solid colored, not over-sized, not 100% cotton items.

I have choices now and variety in my wardrobe and it’s freaking me out a little!

However, I still struggle on a regular basis with being comfortable in clothes that actually fit and have a print and colors.

And cardigans…let’s talk about cardigans. Because I have like 4 of them.

I am always cold now for some reason. I think I’ve lost my insulation. lol I may just need to get a proper winter coat this year instead of the sweatshirt I’ve been wearing. (which, btw, is a men’s 2X and the last one was a 5X!)

Part of my problem is that I didn’t have a closet full of “skinny clothes” to turn to when I lost weight like some people do. I was pretty much the size I was for a number of years.

2008 is when my heaviest weight was on my medical records and seriously, it may have been even before then.

So I’ve basically had to start completely over.

I have shopped on Poshmark for a lot of things and will definitely be listing a number of clothes I have shrunk out of on there. I also found some great deals at Hips, which is a plus sized retail store in my area. They have great prices and have a pretty good variety of clothing to look at and try on.

And again, not complaining – just really been struggling with it all. I guess I don’t feel like I was expecting to feel this way about clothes. Maybe I didn’t think about it or maybe it was just because I haven’t been to this size or place as an adult and had no clue what to expect.

But I feel like a hot mess of uncomfortableness on a regular basis. I try to stay with clothes I am comfortable in, but I have some outfits that I just am not 100% comfy in, although I think they look ok on me.

I’m getting there though…it’s definitely a work in progress.

How about you? Have you lost (or even gained) a lot of weight and lost your identity with clothes? Can you relate to my struggle? Leave me a comment and we can support each other!

Weekly Weigh In – Week 30


I know it’s the eve of another weigh in but I wanted to document that I have weeks where I gain as well.

This past week I gained 1.5 lbs. Which puts me at 50.4 lost.

And since I like to show the loss in a visual way and makes it so easy…



I just want to add that when I weighed in I was wearing a size 18/20 pants and at the beginning of this part of my journey I was in a size 26 pants. Right now I am wearing a pair of my husband’s 2x cotton pajama pants.

I have mentioned the clothing issues in previous posts. I really need to sit down and put all my thoughts about that together. I have been having a really difficult time with shrinking out of clothes and not knowing what my style is.

When you get to a certain size you are limited to where you can find those sizes and whenever I found a top that I felt comfortable in I would get it in every color or multiple colors. Hence why I have 3 short sleeved collar shirts each in a different color. We can wear collared shirts to work…I guess they’re called polo shirts. We can wear them to work. I would have gotten the shirt in 5 different colors, but I just had 3.

Like I’ve said before, I have a whole clothing post in the works. I need to sit and actually put it together.

Does anyone else know where I’m coming from though? Leave me a comment! I’d love to connect with you!

Weekly Weigh In – Weeks 20 – 29


Ok…so been a while since there has been a weigh in update. AND why is this week’s graphic different than the others…Well, I wanted it to be a little special…because…



Insert happy dance here!!!!

Total lost to date is actually 51.9 lbs…or


Wow. Whenever I see these graphics from I can’t believe I was carrying that weight (and more) around with me every day. Amazing what the human body is capable of.

I did have a few hiccups getting to 50 lbs. I did have a few small gains getting there and a week where I didn’t lose quite enough.

Talk about frustrating!!! Being 0.8 lbs away and losing 0.5 lbs made me want to throw something…but THEN to gain that 0.5 the next week?? UGH.


Here I am on the other side of 50 lbs lost and moving forward.

Here are a couple meal photos from the past week and one of my 50 lb award.




The photos were posted on my Instagram page. Follow me there for more meal photos, inspiration, or to follow along with my life in photos.

I follow a lot of people on Instagram who are on program. I think it’s great to follow people on social media who are going through the same thing that you are. It’s a good support system and a number of them post great inspiration and motivational graphics. Sometimes it helps to just browse through your feed and see something that applies to your day. Makes you feel a little better right on the spot.

So…I am still plugging away on program. I’m stepped up my walking and added an extra 2000 steps to my FitBit goal of 6000…I haven’t met the new goal of 8000 yet, but I just set it on Friday, so hopefully I’ll be able to meet it this week while walking on break and lunch at work.

Thanks to everyone who has been following my journey. I appreciate the support.

I do have a few posts I am working on in my brain. I just need to sit down and write them. One is about the clothing issues I’ve been having It’s a long story and a mess. That will be the next post.

In the meantime though, 75 lbs….I’m coming for you!!

Any questions, comments, words of support, complaints? Leave me a comment!

Motivation Monday

Yeah, I know…everyone and their brother is doing “Motivation Monday.”

But couldn’t we all use some motivation? Especially on a Monday!

I have been struggling with the weight loss lately. Post coming soon about that…maybe tomorrow. Need to sit down and write.

These were all posted on Instagram. The links are to the posts on Iconsquare.

Motivation Monday

Posted on Instagram by weightwatcherwarrior with the words: “Be proud of your success, you’ve earned it.”

Motivation Monday

Posted on Instagram by weightwatcherwarrior

Motivation Monday

Posted on Instagram by weightwatchers_a_100lbs with the words, “We’ve ALL been there when you feel like giving up! You have come a long way! Be Strong and keep going!!!!”


I hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Do you have any motivation to share this Monday?? Leave a comment!

From the Other Side

I really just want this to be a quick post.

I believe that people who have died can communicate with their living family and friends in a number of different ways.

A friend of mine’s brother recently passed and music was really important to him. She will often hear songs that remind her of him or that he used to play on his guitar.

Some people call these things coincidence. Call it what you want. We all believe differently and that is ok. Makes the world diverse and each of us unique.

I have my own incidents with my own family members and I think I have shared some of them in a post on when I was blogging there. (I’ll have to look)

Anyway…to the reason for me blogging tonight.

I had a dream about my Puppa.

In my dream we had left him to live at what I can only describe as a hospital or some other kind of facility but it was kind of like a home.

We – I know I wasn’t alone but I didn’t see who was with me…I assume my husband? – went to visit him and see how he was doing.

We had to wait a while because he was busy or unavailable for whatever reason.

When he did finally come see us he bounded down a staircase and almost immediately had a seizure.

But…omg it was the shortest, smallest grand mal seizure I’ve ever seen in my life.

It was like one minute he was seizing and the next he was up wagging his tail and then he bounded back up the stairs.

And that was it.

To me though…that is a sign. I think it’s a sign from him to say he’s ok and he’s doing good work wherever he is and even though he had a seizure, it was no big deal and he just went back about his business.

I needed to see that. I have been missing him lately and it helped me feel better about having to let him go.

Run free Topaz…